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This technique actually tightens your mouth too, so he’s very unlikely to be complaining that your mouth looks like a prolapsed plum.
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Cover your teeth with your lips while you suck – yes, you look like you don’t have any teeth but it feels nicer for him and he’ll be too busy going wild to care. Just don’t! No man ever wanted to be bitten on the dick. If all else fails, make silence impossible: tweak that nipple harder. Either talk and ask if he likes it or say you want to hear him – although make it clear you mean moans of pleasure or commands and not a recital of the Green Party manifesto. Has he gone quiet? Some men get self-conscious making too much noise so you should encourage him to break that. It’s a chance to check whether he’s enjoying himself or bored out of his mind. Keep an eye on him – look up to see how he’s going. No need to get too complicated or it can become rather functional – “Right, I just need to make sure I’m at the optimum angle for you to teabag me” – so keep it simple and very much in the moment. Change positions as you go, too: from below, from behind, a 69. Don’t worry too much about an exact amount you’re sucking someone off, not doing your tax return. Get involved with the balls too, alternate between sucking or licking them and the penis itself – a ratio of around 80:20 should do it.
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You barely have to touch the skin it shouldn’t distract him too much from the blow job, really. Reach up and touch his chest, gently tweak a nipple. The more excited he gets – and he will get excited – make the strokes shorter and more urgent. Good places to stroke while blowing a guy: the side of his torso, across his belly, thighs, perineum, where his buttocks join the leg. This can help arouse the areas your mouth might not be covering.
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To save your cheek muscles and give your tongue a quick break, wank him while he’s in your mouth. If you’re in it for the long haul, you need to change things up – for your own sanity if nothing else.
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If your throat is filing a complaint, why not try some light restriction and hold his hands down? He’ll love it. Being able to see some of his penis while you suck it will actually be a turn-on: "My how big you are! I can’t even take all of you in!" If he starts forcing your head down harder – boys will be boys, after all – it might just be a sign he’s getting over excited rather than a criticism. Make sure you use your tongue as much as possible as you move your mouth up and down and around – sucking it like it’s a lollipop isn’t hugely pleasurable – and don’t feel any pressure to have all of him in your mouth at all times.
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Build up to maybe a little tongue contact on the head or round the sides, back to the top of his thighs and then, when he is least expecting it, go full plunge. Why? Well, it’s hilarious to watch him squirm, for one, but mainly because it’s hot. Kiss, touch and lick almost every part of him that isn’t the penis. And when he can take no more, when he’s begging, and promising to hand over his PIN ands the keys to his car, it’s time to get going. Tenderly run your hand along the waistband of his underwear, touch his penis through the fabric very gently, almost imperceptibly. Once opened, or unbuttoned, gently slide his trousers down over his hips and down to his thighs, like there’s an unexploded bomb within – which there kind of is if you think about it. Unzip slowly – not only to create tension but also to avoid an emergency dash to the hospital – and sensuously.
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A good BJ begins even before the zip is open. Yes, penises are extremely exciting and you may well not be able to wait to get your hands on it, but the build-up us just as important. Just take a few hints from them rather then replicating every single move – you may well scare the bejesus out of your partner. These guys are professionals whose gag reflex only kicks in when they have food poisoning. But remember: nobody is expecting a perfect porno reenactment. While it may be a little rougher than you would experience in everyday life – and porn actors seem to be strangers to lockjaw or tired tongues – if there’s something in there that gets you excited, chances are he’ll be into it too. What more excuse do you need? Watching pornography can be a great way to bone up on technique. A bad BJ technique is remembered for a long time but, if you follow this guide, you’re well on the way to being a fond memory and not a horror story.